


his angel

by tomlinscoff



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-05
Updated: 2013-01-05
Packaged: 2017-11-23 17:46:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/624876
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tomlinscoff/pseuds/tomlinscoff
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes Zayn couldn’t believe that Louis was real. He was too tiny, too fragile, and too perfect to be real, and especially to be Zayn’s. But here the seemingly angelic boy lay, wrapped up in Zayn’s love and boney arms.</p>
            </blockquote>





	his angel

Louis threw an arm around Zayn, whose heart was pounding ridiculously hard, as they sat in their dinky living room, watching their pathetic little Christmas tree.

“I love you.” Zayn whispered into Louis’ ear, feeling the need to constantly remind the magical boy how special he truly was.

The Bradford native was having the best night of his life. The two boys were spending their favorite holiday together, getting piss drunk in their tiny cooped up flat, sitting around their lanky and horribly decorated tree, and Zayn didn’t know if there was any way life could get more perfect.

They’d spent the last two hours decorating the cheapest tree they could find on such short notice, seeing as they forgot to buy a tree until today, Christmas Eve. The duo threw on things that only desperate and poor uni students could view as a potential ornament, like a pair of boxers that Harry left at their place the last time he felt it was necessary to get naked, condoms, and despite Louis’ protests, baby pictures of the two together. They added a picture of Louis’ bare bum to the top of their one meter tall tree as their star. (Zayn could hear Louis’ voice tinkling distantly, “My ass is the star of everything!” Zayn had to agree.) Zayn had never seen such a beautiful tree, and only because it was their tree, made up of things that related to their lives.

Louis goofily grinned, burrowing his face into the side of Zayn’s neck and making goosebumps arise from the sensation of his hot breath on the younger’s bare skin. After a few hiccups, he moved his arm off Zayn’s shoulders, causing the black haired boy to bite his lip to stop himself from begging Louis to touch him again.

Their busted up red love seat creaked as Louis moved closer, wrapping his arms low around the Pakistani’s middle. He rested his tan cheek against Zayn’s denim clad thigh, and oh god, was he trying to kill Zayn? With those shiny red lips so close to his crotch and those bright blue eyes staring up at him through chocolate brown eyelashes, he must have wanted Zayn to be writing up his will.

Louis’ soft but slightly calloused hands moved around Zayn’s body, tracing little designs into his arms, pinching his cheeks, and tapping against his clothed ribcage. None of this was helping regulate his heart rate, which was now the fastest it’s ever been in his twenty years of living.

With some hasty moving around, Louis was crawling into Zayn’s lap and squirming around. He was adorable, moving around to get himself comfortable with his legs sprawled out on the opposite side of the couch, leaning his head against Zayn’s chest. The inky black haired boy ducked down and smacked a quick peck against Louis’ forehead.

“I love you.” he repeated, mumbling the phrase against Louis’ skin as he kissed his way down the tanned face before him. Sometimes Zayn couldn’t believe that Louis was real. He was too tiny, too fragile, and too perfect to be real, and especially to be Zayn’s. But here the seemingly angelic boy lay, wrapped up in Zayn’s love and boney arms.

Pulling away, Zayn replaced the kisses along Louis’ defined cheekbone with his thumb, tracing over the jutting bone tenderly. “You’ve never looked as beautiful as you do now, in my arms where you belong.” The only true constant in his life was Louis. “You’re perfect, you know. And I love you so much.” The only thing that mattered to him, the only reason for him living, and the only person he could ever love. It was always Louis, and it’d always be Louis.

He seemed so small and breakable, lying motionless in Zayn’s lap. The only way one could tell he wasn’t a porcelain doll was the way his long fingers were delicately curling against the neckline of the Pakistani’s tacky Christmas sweater as he licked his plush pink lips. He looked up through his gorgeous dark brown eyelashes at Zayn, conveying an unsaid message between the two that took years for him to unlock the meaning of.

He tilted the other’s chin up for easier access to plant a soft and sweet kiss against the lips he knew and loved. If Zayn could pause time and stay there, kissing and drowning Louis in his love forever, he’d do it in a heartbeat. Even after being with the Doncaster boy for so long, he still gave Zayn a fluttering feeling in his chest, making it hard to think straight or even breathe with the simplest of glances and touches.

Louis was swiftly and gracefully lifted from Zayn’s lap into his arms, bridal style, as the younger walked them from their creaky musty sofa to their tiny cramped bedroom. The boy Zayn needed more than air looked so content with his arms wrapped around Zayn’s neck, nuzzling his blissful face into the Pakistani’s chest.

If it wasn’t for the brunette’s sudden head movement towards the bed, Zayn wouldn’t have noticed that he was nearly about to trip over the bed because he was so distracted by staring at the sweet creature in his grasp. The Bradford native slowly eased Louis down onto their shared fluffy bed, grinning down at him.

“Gorgeous, Lou, as always.” he awed as he hovered over his love. To see Louis angelically spread out like this, all for him, made Zayn’s heart beat three times as fast and cause the blood to rush away from his head. Leaning in close to the boy below him, stopping centimeters from the other’s lips, Zayn whispered, “I love you, Louis.”

Louis’ face broke out into a tiny grin as he whispered back, “Love you too, Zayn.” before tugging Zayn down onto him for a much needed kiss.

 

Sunshine spilled in from the window onto the bed and Zayn’s serene face. It was the moment of truth. With his eyes still closed, a part of him was hopeful that for once, he’d wake up to an occupied bed and he’d be able to see Louis sleeping majestically, looking as beautiful as ever. He was wrong.

Beside him lay nothing, as it had been the last 365 mornings. He was alone, as always. All he wanted, all he needed, was to be able to wake up one morning and be able to smell the slightly cinnamon scent of Louis that lingered everywhere he went, feel his feathery soft hair against his own face, and be able to hold Louis’ petite delicate warm body against his own, so close that they were one. But he could never have that opportunity with Louis since he lay cold and motionless, six feet in the ground.

It should have been him that awful day, not Louis. Louis had such a bright future in front of him and now he’s gone, all because of Zayn. He hated himself for being the reason Louis was out on Christmas Eve. If only he insisted that Louis stayed home and instead let Zayn get the groceries that they’d forgot when they went to the store earlier, since they had rushed out in a blissfully ignorant cloud of love, wanting nothing more to be at home in bed, pawing at each other’s bodies, not in the queue for food. If Zayn went instead, then he could have been shot at in the robbery, not Louis. 

He detested the universe for taking his love from him. The Pakistani wanted to throw up bile just thinking of how suddenly and unfairly the perfect boy that his world revolved around was plucked from existence.

After a few hours of just lying stunned and motionless in their bed, surrounded by joyful pictures of the duo scattered across their bedside tables, Zayn mustered up the strength to make his way into the destroyed living room that he’d tore up in a fit of rage and anguish a year ago that day when he heard the life-crushing news. The only thing left untouched was the tree the two decorated together in a mess of lingering touches and kisses. He could almost feel Louis’ lips pressed against his cheek and his ears rang with the faint chiming of Louis’ laughter from when he had stuck a candy cane in Zayn’s mouth before he could swoop in for a proper kiss.

Zayn missed giving Louis hugs and kisses and sloppy blowjobs and his whole vulnerable heart. He’d never get the chance to Louis the gift that took him forever to muster up the courage to give. Their lives were planned to drastically change that night, but not in the horrible twist of fate that it did.

Deathly silent, Zayn picked up the blue velvet ring box and opened it to look at the symbol of what could have been the rest of his life with Louis, and all he’d ever wanted. He crumpled to the ground, crying, cold, and empty inside.


End file.
